Latest Timeshift Talk Posts at VideoSift.com

PQUEUED Monday 2: Time

paul4dirt (http://timeshift.videosift.com/member/paul4dirt) — Mon, 17 Aug 2009 16:53:32 -0700

(8 comments - 234 views)

The second edition of 'pqueud monday', the one day in the week we give a little bit of extra attention to pqueued videos.

And like Deano suggested, it's a themed edition. In honor of the incredible '9.58' the theme is 'Time'.

It's quite a broad theme, so it's not gonna be too hard to find some great pqueued videos that fit the theme. Post 1 pqueued vid, preferably not from your own pqueue, and try to stick to the theme. Enjoy!

Ill start with http://www.videosift.com/video/Ratatat-Seventeen-Years-Xerox-made-fan-video

- paul4dirt

Cutting down my VS time - Thanks Everybody

mintbbb (http://timeshift.videosift.com/member/mintbbb) — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 09:03:23 -0700

(24 comments - 445 views)
I did sift tons for a while, I enjoyed it, and thanks for all the votes I got I even got my crown, and got to be #5 of all time! It was fun, exciting and I loved it!

Maybe I am just generally depressed atm, but I don't feel like going out and finding any videos to sift. I never was active on commenting, so that won't change... But right now, I just don't think I can find anything to sift, and I can't even come here to watch the stuff people submitted, because I am just burned out.. or depressed, or something..

I am sorry I am cancelling my charter membership for now. But if I am not active, my little barista paycheck can't really afford too much. Especially when I have cut down my hours at work because I feel like I am going to have a nervous breakdown if I work over 20 hours a week.. NetRunner is fine so far, he's working just fine and making most of the money for the household, but I can't make him pay for my addictions, especially when my addictions are not very stable..

In any case, I want to say THANKS, Thanks, and thanks..! It has been fun! I love this place, and I hope to be back, and sane one day soon. I am so sorry I haven't upvoted more, checked out more submissions, sponsored more newbies.. Good Lord, I should not be crying when I am typing this, but I feel like I am saying goodbye to a friend.. even if most of the people here never even knew me.

Like I said, I love this place, I might be back and be active, I might be back and just submit a video every now and then.. I don't know.. I just want to stay sane

- Mint

- mintbbb

Brilliant Scheme To Attain The Love Of Your Friend

yourhydra (http://timeshift.videosift.com/member/yourhydra) — Tue, 26 May 2009 21:04:52 -0700

(13 comments - 567 views)
So, you're in love with one of your friends, but she has a boyfriend and probably wouldn't have sex with you anyway.

What you will need: 1 x knife, 1 x ring, access to a sunbed, the ability to grow a beard.

Step One: Place the ring on your wedding finger and avoid contact with your friend for a month.

Step Two: Stop shaving and use the sunbed to gain a tan.

Step Three: After a month when your beard is full and your tan is noticeable, remove the ring from your finger.

Step Four: Remove all your clothes and break into your friend's house.

Step Five: Use the knife to cut your body in various places. Avoid the face. If possible, focus on your back. The more blood the better.

Step Six: Enter your friend's bedroom and lie face down on the floor. Wait for her return.

Step Seven: When she enters the room pretend to be unconscious. Allow her to turn you over and try to wake you for a few seconds before you open your eyes. The injuries to your body will serve as a distraction to your nakedness. She will be more concerned about your wellbeing instead of fearing the naked man in her room.

Step Eight: When she asks you what's happened you should ignore her questions. Instead you must act confused and ask the date. If it's September 15th she will say 'September 15th' to which you must reply 'No, what year is it?'

Step Nine: Upon hearing the year say the words 'It worked.' Pretend to lose consciousness again for a few seconds, implying that whatever it is that has worked took a great effort.

Step Ten: If your friend is a curious person she will probably ask 'What worked?', even if she doesn't ask this question it is important that you now say the words '(Insert Friend's Name), I'm from the future' in your most deadpan voice.

Step Eleven: Pause for ten seconds to allow the incrediblness of the situation to sink in. There will be no reason for her to doubt your claim, because your beard will make you appear many years older and your cuts would add weight to the idea that you've come from a post-apocalyptic future where a war is currently taking place.

Step Twelve: Raise your left hand to your face. All women are very observant, so your friend will immediately notice the tanline on your wedding finger. If she is educated to a decent standard she will realise that you are married and your ring has simply disappeared, because clothing and other items cannot travel through time. Your nudity will support this.

Step Thirteen: Now comes the hard part - The monologue. In your own words you must give a speech in which you mention all of these key points:

a) You are married to each other in the future
b) Her current boyfriend is dead
c) The world is coming to an end. It's up to you to pick a reason, but I would recommend a war against machines. This whole situation will be backed up by the Terminator franchise
d) In the future your relationship is not going well
e) You've come back in time because you can't help but feel that she would have been happier with her current boyfriend if he hadn't been killed
f) Her current boyfriend is going to be hit by a bus on a day six months from her present. She should stop him going to work that day
g) If she does exactly what you say this current version of yourself will be erased and you will never get married. If she questions this flaw in your time travel logic, because you cannot change the past, simply reference Back to the Future

Step Fourteen: Unless your friend is made of stone she will now be overcome by emotion, especially at your selflessness. Get to your feet and go to kiss her goodbye. It is important that you do this with the confidence of a man who has done this to her many times.

Step Fifteen: There is now no possible way that you aren't about to have sex with her. You're naked, kissing her, in her bedroom, agreeing to erase a version of yourself from history to make her happy. And as far as she knows you've had sex many times in a future that will no longer happen, so she thinks to herself that maybe she should have one memory of it.

Step Sixteen: After having the sex, ask to borrow some clothes then leave.

Step Seventeen: Shave off your beard and coat your wedding finger in fake tan. Carry on as if nothing has happened. There will be three possible outcomes:

1) During the sex some feelings that she didn't know existed are awakened and she will leave her boyfriend for you.
2) Life will carry on as normal.
3) You will be filled with guilt because of this moral gray area where you aren't entirely sure if what you've done counts as some kind of low level rape. You will take your own life by hanging, overdose or wrist cutting.

Taken from: http://batteriesfeelincluded.blogspot.com/2009/05/309.html

- yourhydra

Our newest Crowning has happened! Congratulations Mintbbb

Gratefulmom (http://timeshift.videosift.com/member/Gratefulmom) — Sat, 18 Apr 2009 06:13:45 -0700

(43 comments - 1099 views)

Mintbbb has been Crowned! Mintbbb was one of the first sifters I met here. She finds the best of the best videos to share with us, many of which have shot up to the top 15. I'm not very good at making these talk post but wanted to Congratulate Mint on reaching amazing heights here, and thank her for being a good friend to us all. Be sure to check out her personal queue http://www.videosift.com/member/mintbbb/pqueued to find gems you might of missed the first time around.

- Gratefulmom

Concerning Queued and Published

gwiz665 (http://gwiz665.videosift.com) — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 14:35:46 -0800

(13 comments - 528 views)
Who ever came up with that fucking idea?

Can we please just switch over to only ever showing queued? There is no valid reason for ever having the other time showed, since it only confuses and infuriates us (me). Especially now when dupeofs are flying every which way.

I request that the present system be changed, because it sucks. Who's with me?

- gwiz665

FOUR Sift milestones, ONE congratulatory post. Got an hour?

kronosposeidon (http://timeshift.videosift.com/member/kronosposeidon) — Sat, 15 Nov 2008 22:12:35 -0800

(50 comments - 1725 views)

Four, count 'em, FOUR sifters have hit major milestones recently:

mintbbb - Silver Diamond
theaceofclubz - Bronze Diamond
lavoll - Gold 100
nibiyabi - Gold 100

So let's show 'em a little respect, m'kay?

Mintbbb is fairly quiet, so you may not know much about her. She hails from Finland (though she now lives in the U.S.), is a Starbuck's barista, is also la dame de temps changé, and is NetRunner's First Lady. What you probably DO know about her is that she came here out of nowhere (only 7 months ago) and stormed this joint with one Top 15 video after another. So while some of us blather on by writing over 6700 comments, some others are doing their job: Posting videos.

Any day she'll be cracking the Top 15 All Time Sifters list, so this recognition comes not a moment too soon.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

VideoSift's resident superhero, theaceofclubz, recently got his Bronze Diamond, and has been here for about 1½ years, yet I know very little about him because he's another quiet one. (What's that like, not vomiting every thought you have into the comment sections? ) His bio indicates that he's a U.S. Army veteran who served in Afghanistan, and is now attending the University of Wisconsin - Madison to become a chemical engineer. So chances are he's not stupid. One thing most of us have seen, however, is that the dude knows how to rake in the votes for his videos. As of the time I'm writing this post, out of 279 posted videos (sifted + unsifted + PQ), he has received a total of 12,149 votes. That averages out to 43.5 votes per video. That's a better average than sifting wizards Zifnab (34.2 votes/video) , eric3579 (43.1 votes/video), and arvana (34.2 votes/video) . In fact I'm pretty sure he has the best average here.

He really is a superhero. He doesn't need the damn goggles.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Between the time
when the oceans drank Atlantis,
and the rise of the sons of Aryas,
there was an age undreamed of.
And onto this, Lavoll,
destined to wear the jeweled Gold 100
of Aquilonia upon a troubled brow.
It is I, his kronocler,
who alone can tell thee of his saga.
Let me tell you of the days of high adventure!

Lavoll is another of the Sift's resident ~~Nordmanns~~ Nordmenn¹ (Norwegians). His descent from Viking barbarians scares the shit out of me, almost as much as these lil' Vikings do:

However he's actually a Viking with a song in his heart. He's a professional musician who works in film and TV. In other words, he's probably one of those rare individuals who has a job he actually likes. Yeah, I hate people like him too. He doesn't haunt this place regularly like many of us, which is probably why many of his videos slip through the cracks, because the more you post the more people know about you and your tastes. So please visit his PQ to learn about his crush on Sheena Easton. It would appear that our Norseman has a thing for the Celtic ladies.

He knows what is best in life.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Now I'm not exactly sure what nibiyabi's story is. I know he likes sports from all the sports videos he posts, yet he has a Charles Darwin avatar, but he's a major in both psychology and political science. (Lemme tell you something, those psych folks get into psychology for a reason. Trust me. ) So let's see: Just for comparison, are there any famous persons with a background in politics and psychology, and who *cough cough*used Darwinism as an excuse for a *cough cough* cleansing? Hmmm...

Radovan Karadžić - Politician, doctor of psychiatry, ethnic cleanser

Yikes! Better call The Hague now!
Yikes! This might be the first congratulatory post where an honoree is likened to a war criminal!
Yikes! I think nibiyabi has a good enough sense of humor to handle my dark comic stylings!

YIKES!! Now it's time for us to congratulate all of our honorees for their contributions to Siftopia. GADZOOKS!! These Sift Talk posts are getting longer and longer all the time!
______________________________________________

1. Thanks for the correction, SpellNazi rasch187.

- kronosposeidon